Holidays are sad for some, Our 4th Year- Annual Thread

Posts: 3854 · Posted: 11.12.2013, 15:54

OUR (YEAR #4) TRADITIONAL HOLIDAY THREAD: OPEN DISCUSSION

IT IS NOT TO JUDGE, BUT FOR SUPPORT, AND TO LISTEN.

THIS TIME OF YEAR, IS ESPECIALLY HARD FOR MANY PEOPLE.
AND FEELINGS OF SADNESS CAN TURN INTO DESPAIR......

HOWEVER, TALKING HELPS AND SOMETIMES, WE FORGET THAT.

I AM ASKING............ "DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT?"

FOR ME....
MY FAMILY IS WHO I CHOOSE TO LOVE, AND YOU ARE MY FAMILY.

CRUSHERS ARE THEE BEST AT:
LIFTING YOU UP, SHOWING THEY CARE, LISTENING AND LOVING OR OFFERING PRAYER.......

Love, Patti

Posts: 3854 · Posted: 11.12.2013, 16:16

Breaking tradition somewhat, I want to post first this year.
As many of you already know, this year has been hard for me, losing my mommy. (The day after Christmas last year, my hubby lost his mom. I lost mine on May 10th. They both suffered from emphysema, a terminal form of COPD)

I have basically told everyone I will not be participating in any Christmas activities in my home this year. I do not regret this decision, everyone says they feel the same and understand. My daughter is going to stay in California this year on the holiday vacation (from school) and she has to work on Christmas because she works in a pet hotel. She is thankful to be busy. I have promised her (and everyone) that next year we will be starting a new tradition, all of us coming over to make stuff to decorate the tree with.
Food will be a potluck style with everyone doing their part. That we will honor the old tradition of C-Eve dinner, but on Christmas, instead of going to our own homes to have our seperate day, we will again get together to play family games, eat leftovers on paper plates, and help take down the tree together. No burden on 1, me. And the gift is the celebration, so nobody needs to feel guilt, me.

With all that being said, I am glad they all understand, but honestly I would not care if they didn't. I remember well the days near the end when she was so wide eyed and child like, wanting to protect her from all of 'them" and I am so thankful I got to spend it with her.
Mostly, I just miss my mommy. Alot.

Posts: 1740 · Posted: 11.12.2013, 19:43

Oh I know exactley how you feel and my older sister said my mom would be disapointed in me as she was a big holiday person and we lost her Dec 2nt 2009 and her birthday is the 21st of December and me being handicapped I took care of her the best that hospice or any of the siblins could think i could do and her passing her I just couldnt bring myself to holidays.Last year I did nothing for Thanksgiving and then I think my mom had plans of her own as this last Christmas eve here came first 4 grandchildren with back packs to let nana and papa know by Midnight their home was going to be locked shut (evicted)and we hadnt even shopped so they got very little that norning but luckily i had a tree in a box so they really wanted to get it out and decorate which really was a test as the decorations were my moms she had many many years while us kids were growing up.Well this Thanksgiving we still had all 6 here and they made sure nana got a turkey so we all made a big turkey dinner as I know my mother would have been discusted in me if my grandkids EVER went without because I was still mourning and now the discussion is when are we going to go get a real tree for Christmas.Their mom got a job a couple weeks back so she will have a big enough check to do a couple Santa gifts and I was able (being that Dale and I are both handicapped permanetly) to get each a smaller gift but you know I feel this year my mom is smiling down at me as I never reliased how even as adults we were depemdent upon my mom for the holidays and I think I better get use to it as they all are depending upon me this year in which YES I am the mom so I better shape up..(so sorry for the book)

Posts: 1263 · Posted: 11.12.2013, 23:52

As time marches on... there ard good days and bad days and just days. The bad days eventually turn to just days. The trick is to cherish the good days.
The same holds true with our lost loved ones. Cherish the time and memories
you have, forever. And the wisdom to do the same, with those who love you. Every day on this planet is a blessing, we get relatively few. Keep love in your heart, a smile on your face...there's always tomorrow !!!

Posts: 463 · Posted: 25.12.2013, 17:31

hi gang,im on a rogs lab top,soyoull have to excusetype, my best friend lost her brother about six months ago,then ilost my brotheron sept 8th she then losther husbandon sept11. which brings me torogs fallup congrete steps on nov.19my bad luck no.he cracked his head open and broke his hip in 3 placesit was touch and go with him. thanks to our kids getting together with a plan, rog is now on way back to d/recovering.the next thing is I fell 3 days laterdown a flight of stairs, I landed on congrete on my sidewhich was lucky, I broke my arm andmy hip.which brings me to today. rog and I have been living in a rehab center since nov.but were alive, gthats why iv been offline.i just wanted to wish every 1 a merry Christmas. so until I can get back on line , it bye for now,josie46

Posts: 1263 · Posted: 26.12.2013, 09:42

OMG Josie that is crazy bad luck. We were worried here at PC cause nobody really knew anything. My best wishes to you and Rog, and pray for your complete and hopefully swift recoveries from now on. You two can put 2013 behind you. The coming New Year is full of possibilities ! Merry Christmas to you and your families ! Keep the Faith !!! Hugs,
CATLICKER

Posts: 3854 · Posted: 26.12.2013, 23:49

CRUSHERS.......

I AM SO VERY SORRY FOR THE DELAY IN RESPONDING, I HAVE BEEN IN A BIT OF A SLUMP MYSELF.
THAT IS NO EXCUSE FOR NOT GIVING YOU SOMETHING FROM MY HEART, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU POURED YOURS OUT SO TRUSTINGLY.

(((((THANKS RICK))))) FOR YOUR VERY THOUGHTFUL COMMENTS. 1 REASON WE LOVE YA SO DARN MUCH...... wink

(((((((((((CHARLA & JOSIE))))))))))

PLEASE KNOW MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU BOTH, ANYTIME, NOT JUST IN THE HOLIDAY SEASON. YOU ARE BOTH SUCH GOOD PEOPLE WHO HAVE NOT ALWAYS HAD IT EASY, NOT EASY AT ALL.
THE GOOD LORD MUST HAVE FAITH ON JUST HOW STRONG YOU ARE, EACH DAY IT SEEMS HE IS TRYING TO SHOW OFF YOUR STRENGTH, WITH ALL THE WEIGHT ON YOUR SHOULDERS, I AM SO SORRY.

I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU DO IT, EITHER ONE OF YOU??
IF YOUR (BLOOD) FAMILY HAS NOT TOLD YOU LATELY, LET ME TELL IT-

YOU ARE APPRECIATED!!
AND LOVED!! AND ADMIRED!!

AND YOU ARE ALSO VERY MUCH MISSED WHENEVER YOU ARE NOT AROUND... Sad

PLEASE ACCEPT HUGS, NOT JUST NOW, TODAY, TOMORROW, FOREVER!

(BIG-TIME) CRUSHER
.................................

.............................

WE ALL WANT YOU TO FEEL THE CRUSH FAMILY LOVE, AND WISH BETTER TOMORROW'S ARE SOON TO COME.

Posts: 1263 · Posted: 27.12.2013, 12:06

Flattery will get you everywhere...

...and it will get me in trouble with your husband !!! Razz

Posts: 463 · Posted: 04.01.2014, 22:04

higang, im back . rog is still in hospital , but hes getting better. ty all for the kind words.tc all josie46

Posts: 1263 · Posted: 06.01.2014, 02:08

YaaaaaaaY !!! So glad to see you back Josie, and glad to also hear Rog is on way to recovery !!! Welcome Back !!!