Guru LESSON: Poker Etiquette

Posts: 2913 · Posted: 30.10.2007, 13:27

Guru LESSON: Poker Etiquette

Hello to my gentlemen and gentlewomen poker players.

That is exactly the persona you want to bring to the forefront in yourself as a successful player. There are two types at the tables wherever you play, and the winners will consistently be those with the best poker manners. They will also be the most respected in general. The others show a lack of poker education and also a lack of knowledge of poker behavior. They simply do not know how to handle themselves properly and it shows.

This will be a very easy lesson for me to teach this particular group....because every one of you that I can think of is already very well-mannered. It is a natural part of your personalities, and my theory is that it is one of the factors that hold you (us) together as a kindred group. You have noticed, I'm sure, the difference in those who get banned or who leave voluntarily. They lack a certain something that you just naturally have.

So now, all I have to do for this chapter of your course, is to provide you with a few tools to polish yourselves until you feel comfortable in giving off the appearance that you want to portray....and portray effortlessly and with ease. There are a few particulars of etiquette that apply only at the poker tables and that is what I will concentrate on. But first I will present a general overview of the persona you should give off....the air about you with which you handle yourselves that portrays you as REAL poker players, as it were.

I am going to start by talking about your appearance and your first reaction may very well be WHY, since you are playing at home on your computers for the most part. There is a very good reason: it is to help you assume the ATTITUDE of the gentlemen and gentlewomen I will describe. The proper manners will then come along with that attitude very naturally. This is what has moved poker to the level of society and popularity it holds today. You are a part of that movement. An early part of it, getting in on the ground floor by choosing to acquire a proper poker education. The "other type" of players would not put forth the effort to do so....and that also shows, losing for them respect. As a respected player, you put a little edge of fear in your opponents before the first hand is ever dealt, and that is to your advantage. It is actually the the first advantage you can acquire.

The first thing to remember at all times is your dignity. A winning player is a dignified player. Thus the terms "gentlemen" and "gentlewomen".

A gentlewoman is a magnificent thing to behold. She is not giggly, not flirtacious, not flashy, not gum-chewing, and does not follow fashion fads. She gives off an air of independence, maturity, and accustomed success. She expects not one bit more of anything than the gentlemen receive....and not one bit less. At the poker tables, we find true equality. The gentlewoman is not loud. She is at ease and a bit reserved. More like a Barbara Walters than a Katie Couric. More like a Gina Davis than a Brittany Spears.

It is just as important that the gentlemen present themselves in a non-flashy, non-flambouyant way. The days of the outlandish poker man are gone with poker's new respectability as an established true sport, worthy of ESPN coverage, for example. The new gentleman poker player would never use the tables as a place to seek female attention. Those who do show a disdainful lack of class. Save it for between games!

In other words, both genders should COMMAND, not DEMAND respect from others.

Now to talk in more particulars. It is good to always remember the rule of "one hand to a player and one player to a hand". That means that you should never give advice to another player and you never ask for advice. Your hand is yours alone, and it is your only one.

An important rule that you will often see broken by those "not in the know" is that you should never say a word about your hand until all players have finished the round and the cards are being shuffled. It is extremely ill-mannered to do so. Anything at all you could say about your hand could give an opponent a false conclusion about where certain cards lay....and that would influence his decision-making. That is as close as you can come to cheating without actively cheating. And if you are not playing, but are watching a game, you have no right to say a single word the players could hear. You quite simply are not at that time part of the action.

It is considered very bad form to belittle any player, no matter how bad he may be. The very worst-mannered poker player is the only one who would win a pot and then ridicule the loser. That is an extreme case of lack of etiquette!

In fact, the rules of poker etiquette do not allow the ridicule of any player at any time during a game. Even if that player is a friend of yours and you want to tease him a little....wait until the game is over! Then it is quite okay!

Isn't it amazing that you will never find most of these established rules even mentioned in the so-called poker guides and how-to books. My theory about that is that the authors want to look superior when unknowing players around them break the rules and thereby lose the respect of those in the know. They somehow have the idea that other players looking as bad as possible makes them look much better than they actually are. Personally, I would rather beat someone who was known for having the best of form. I think it would be of higher value!

Before I forget to mention it, let me insert right here that having bad poker etiquette will put you at immediate disadvantage, because you will be flagged as a newbie to the game....not a way to gain respect or put a bit of fear in anyone!

It is considered rude to ask a player what he had after a hand is completed. If he wanted you to know, he would not have mucked his cards. It may seem like a small rudeness, but in poker there is never a good reason for ANY rudeness.

It is not cool to curse or use foul language at the tables. Some may think it makes them look tough, but it only belittles them as players who have no knowledge of the game. As a matter of fact, the player with the best etiquette is usually the one who does the least talking, period. But do not fail to answer any remark made to you....politely. At the end of this lesson, I plan to give you a list of acceptable comments, and not much else is in good form.

Do not hold up the game by waiting until the last few seconds to make your play when you know before that what you are going to do. It shows a lack of respect for the other players. And in a tournament, it makes you look like that is the only way you can stay in the tourney very long....by using up every tick of the clock to keep yourself in. No respect gained there.

By the same token, do not try to rush other players. There may be someone who truly needs....at times....every second allowed. It is simple courtesy to grant him that fair time and to do so without comment.

Do not be guilty of what is called "running out on the blinds". That is, leaving the table or sitting out, when it is your turn to pay the blind. Everybody has to pay the blinds eventually. And there is a big difference between playing smart and being cheap.

Well, gentlewomen and gentlemen, I will probably think of other things along the way, and will bring them up when I do, but you have now had all the basics of poker etiquette, including some advanced rules. If you follow the guidelines I have presented, you will never have reason to be embarrassed by your manners!

Now, here is the list of acceptable comments that are considered to be in good taste:

gc ........ good call/good cards
gg........ good game
itm ...... in the money
n1 ........ nice one
nc ........ nice call
nh ........ nice hand
nhwps .. nice hand, well-played, sir
nhwpm.. nice hand, well-played, ma'am
tu ........ thank you
ty ........ thank you
tx ........ thanks
vn ........ very nice
vnh ...... very nice hand
wcp ...... world class player
wd ........well done
wp ........ well played

And this ends your lesson on Poker Etiquette, my friends. Let me add that I am not in the least worried about the etiquette of my PCers at the tables....or anywhere else!

This lesson has been presented by your

Ever-lovin' Guru

Posts: 1825 · Posted: 30.10.2007, 17:24

Being the gentlewoman that I am *wink* I would love to take this lesson and shove it down some "gentlemans" throats.
I was in a tourney the other night and I beat this guys two pairs with a straight and he called me every nasty name in the book for women. Even a guy at the table told him that was quite enough.

I have had this happen to me over and over. Some men can't handle being beaten by a woman and others are just plain rotten rotten losers.

I wish many more men would read these etiquiette rules. The tables would be much nicer many more times.

Posts: 654 · Posted: 30.10.2007, 21:09

The very fact that another player spoke up on your behalf, Valeria, is evidence of how much respect the others had for him.

Class will always reveal itself, I believe -- and so will the lack of class.

But I know exactly what you mean. I, too, run into that. And nothing infuriates me more!

I hope you have a chance to beat him again and again until he starts refusing to sit at a table with you! He will have to sneak around your table, like the little creep he is!

* LOL! We are really talking like gentlewomen, aren't we? !!!

But, Guru, your lesson really did sink in! It's just a shame that it is not OUR men here at PC who need it most, but the ones who could never last long here!

royalblush

Posts: 22 · Posted: 05.11.2007, 19:51

nice lesson ! glad someone understands what its like lol

Posts: 108 · Posted: 05.11.2007, 21:36

Very well written lesson. During an open buyin game I follow it to a T.

Posts: 2913 · Posted: 10.11.2007, 21:29

So glad to hear it, Queen Bee!

Thank you for posting that. I am flattered that you follow a lesson of mine to a T! "Cause we all know you are a winner!

Your Guru too!

Posts: 243 · Posted: 12.11.2007, 02:30

Thank you Poker Guru.

I often wondered what the emotions were, that I felt whenever I heard, or was shown good manners. It was a kind of warm, relaxing feeling, which made me feel comfortable, and at ease. A feeling that I couldn't quiet describe. The answer was given to me when Rainbow1 said in one of her Rainbow Moments.
"Whenever you are shown good manners, you feel honoured."
That was it !! The word I'd been looking for, for a long time. The feeling that I couldn't quite put a name to, was indeed a feeling that I'd been honoured.
I've always been very attracted to well mannered people. I hear them much louder than anyone else. They always seem to speak clearly and confidently, and always say the right words, at exactly the right time..
No matter how busy I am, I can't help but look up, and turn my head towards good manners.
With repect to your lesson My Poker Guru, may I say that you forgot to mention one relevant point about good manners.
Which is that they are, and always will be, absolutely FREE

Posts: 243 · Posted: 12.11.2007, 20:04

Thank You Poker Guru.

You are absolutely spot on. They're isn't a manual anywhere that contains this valuable lesson.
I'm so impressed by the ammount of importance you have given to this matter.
You lead by pure example.
You are the perfect role model.

Your Loyal Scholar

ALW111.

Posts: 2913 · Posted: 14.11.2007, 12:38

Dear ALW,

My hat is off to you.

I was impressed when I read your words, which I have taken the liberty of copying and pasting here:

"very attracted to well mannered people. I hear them much louder than anyone else. They always seem to speak clearly and confidently, and always say the right words, at exactly the right time..
No matter how busy I am, I can't help but look up, and turn my head towards good manners."

And I find it amazing that we do seem to hear the words of the well-mannered so much more clearly, because they are usually also soft-spoken! Don't you find that very ironic?

Thanks for your input.
Your Guru

Posts: 496 · Posted: 15.11.2007, 03:17

Very very very well written..like you dont know that though Rolling Eyes

lol

Posts: 1192 · Posted: 15.11.2007, 08:19

Excellent Guru Needed to be said its just sad that the people who need this lesson probably won't see it.

Posts: 2913 · Posted: 15.11.2007, 08:30

Isn't that always the way, Msfilly?

Or at least it seems that way. Let's hope they read such things when no one is looking!

Thank you for responding.

Your Guru

Posts: 50 · Posted: 15.11.2007, 17:53

Thanks Guru,

Since I have just started to play poker, instead of casino slots, I
really needed the list of do's and don'ts for poker etiquette! Or at
least the abbreviations! Smile

Connie

Posts: 1100 · Posted: 19.11.2007, 11:17

ty another good lesson

Posts: 2913 · Posted: 30.11.2007, 10:08

concan wrote: › Thanks Guru,

Since I have just started to play poker, instead of casino slots, I
really needed the list of do's and don'ts for poker etiquette! Or at
least the abbreviations! Smile

Connie

Dear Concan,

I offer you a hearty welcome to the vast world of poker!

My first word of advice to you individually is this: Do NOT be intimidated by the posts of the other members who are farther along in their poker education than you are. Most of them had no confidence at all in themselves when they first started.

You may not realize it for a while, but I keep track of my scholars on an individual and personal level. I will know where you are in your progress and try to provide what you most need, when you most need it.

It would be wonderful if you have time to go back and study my old lessons in order.

Also never forget this: every single member here is ready and willing to answer any question you have and they are all but a small......VERY small......few, well-qualified at this time to be of great help to you in any area of poker that concerns you.

Just by reading posts....you will become more poker educated tomorrow than you are today.

Don't worry. Together we will carry you along until you are all "caught up".

Your very honest Guru